Hoeing Your Own Row

Tom and I got married when I was just 19 years old. I remember that I felt quite mature and ready for adulthood at the time. Now, so many years later, I look at 19 year olds and think back to those days, scratch my head and wonder how did we manage it? I’m sure my parents worried and I’m positive they and my grandparents spent a lot of time on their knees praying for us!

We did manage. We were so in love that things like money and possessions really meant very little to us. We both had a pretty strong faith in God and a great love for each other and music. We believed (and still do) that this passion and love is God given, so living with very little was quite honestly, totally fine with us.

We were in music school working on our performance degrees so we spent most of our time during the day in class, and nearly all of our time after class in the practice room. I had a part time job in the library and Tom played gigs on the weekends. This part time work didn’t provide lots of money, but it usually paid the bills and allowed us to study, practice our music and pursue our calling in life.

The first summer we were married we had a week or two when we were a little short on cash. One of Tom’s acquaintances from school told him about a place in town where you could go to get “ pick up” work helping a couple of the farmers who had fields just outside of town. One bright and sunny August morning Tom announced to me that he was going to go out and try to secure some “pick up” work. Being a girl of the 70s I thought, “Well, if he can do it, so can I.” I told Tom that I was going with him so we could make twice the money.

Tom has always been supportive of me. I could tell he was skeptical, but he said if I really wanted to do this, it was fine with him. I said, “Just give me a minute and I’ll get ready.” So I went to the bedroom and grabbed a pair of jeans and put on a casual shirt. I remember that it was my music sorority jersey. I put my long hair in pigtails and proceeded to put on full make up. (You need to understand that I was raised by a traditional Southern mother who taught me to always try to look my best when going anywhere in public). When I came out of the bathroom Tom said, “You look nice, but you realize we’ll be working outside on a farm don’t you?” I said, “of course, I’m wearing my jeans!”

I could tell Tom’s skepticism was growing, but he was nice enough to let me tag along. We went to this business in town where people who wanted to pick up daily farm work would stand and wait for the farmers to stop by. Pretty soon a very nice older gentlemen and his teenage granddaughter pulled up in their truck. The farmer explained that we would be hoeing beets and he would pay us what we considered to be a reasonable hourly wage. We, along with several other college guys loaded onto the truck.

We drove about 2 miles outside of our college town to a field of beets that looked like it must be a mile wide. We stopped along the side of the road and got out of the truck. The farmer demonstrated how to separate one part of the beet plant from the other with his hoe. He explained we were getting the beets ready to be harvested later in the week. He then assigned each of us two rows of beets. These rows were probably one half mile long. We’d each work two rows during the morning hours.

We all grabbed our hoes and went to our assigned rows. Fortunately, Tom’s was right next to mine. Everyone started making their way down the center of their two rows of beets. The farmer and his granddaughter were very experienced at this and they were 20 yards ahead of all of us in a matter of minutes.

I had trouble from the get go. I didn’t completely understand how to use my hoe to separate the one part from the other part of the plant. Tom stopped and took the time to show me the procedure again. This time I got the hang of it a bit better. By now, the rest of the crew was several yards ahead of us. No matter how hard I tried I just couldn’t keep up. I really could only manage one row. And if I am being totally honest, I wasn’t managing that one row very well. Tom worked tirelessly, maintaining his two rows and one of mine. Because he was working three rows he was behind the other workers and because my life and work experience consisted of checking out library books,being a cheerleader and a chick singer, playing piano and being a college music major, I could barely manage my one row. It was just a little humiliating.

I have a competitive spirit and was beating myself up all morning long realizing how far behind I was. I was also feeling terribly guilty that Tom was forced to do part of my work and that was causing him to fall behind. He was also worried about me and kept looking back to check on me.

When it was time to break for lunch I had made it to the end of my row. Tom had heroically managed his two rows and one of mine and the farmer and his granddaughter were sitting at the end of their row having a little break by the time we showed up. (I think they may have shared a laugh or two at my expense). They loaded us back into the truck brought us all back into town for a one hour lunch break.

Tom went back to the beet field that afternoon. I went home and took a shower and decided to go practice my piano. I was fairly confident hoeing beets was not my calling.

This story from our early marriage is one that Tom loves to tell. He especially likes kidding me about the sorority shirt and full make up. He also was aware that everyone on the truck was looking at me that morning and he interpreted their stares to say, “What the heck is she doing here?” You know what, they were right! What the heck was I doing there?

I was out of my element. I was trying to do something that I had no aptitude and no real desire to do. I mean, for the moment I thought I wanted to do it because I wanted to help make some extra money, but had I ever for one moment had a desire to hoe beets on a farm? Well, the answer is an emphatic NO! And that farmer and his granddaughter were highly skilled at harvesting the beets they had planted and tended. They obviously loved their farm and they loved their work. They were in their element.

I also was not able to keep up my assigned row. Tom had to hoe some of my row. Because he was not able to focus on his assigned row he was falling behind as well. He kept a great sense of humor about it, but quite frankly, the extra work he had to do because of me caused him to fall behind on the completion of his assigned rows.  He was relieved when I decided not to come back to work that afternoon.  Actually, I think everyone on the team was glad when I decided not to come back!

I hope the life applications to this story are as obvious to you as they are to me. I think for me, this is a lesson in God’s will and His calling. He gives each of us a row to hoe. This is our assigned task. He shaped us to be able to handle that assignment. We are to work at our assigned rows to the very, very best of our abilities. When someone takes on a row that they were not designed to handle, not only does their personal frustration grow, they slow everyone else down trying to make up for their deficiencies. Yes, we should all be Toms and be willing to help the one who is struggling; but, sometimes people are struggling because they are out of their element and their calling.

Also, sometimes people just feel so self-sufficient that they believe they can handle their row and everyone else’s. Or maybe they just want to be the overseer telling everyone else how to hoe their row and what they are doing wrong, but not willing to do the work of tending to their own assignment. These types of people ask, “Me? You want me to work hard? I’m more of the management type. I like to get a bunch of people around me and let them work hard. I’ll just evaluate their performance.”  Don’t you just love those people?

You have a God given purpose and I have mine. Your giftedness and your calling are different than mine. Don’t envy someone else’s assignment.  Rejoice in the gifts God has given you and rejoice in the assigned task He’s given you. If you want to expand your field of influence I believe you must work hard. (The Bible refers to this type of work as being “as unto the Lord”). Learning, studying, practicing, seeking mentors, praying, praying even more and giving everything you’ve got to complete your assigned row is your calling. This assigned row and how you handle it is an act of worship. God gave you the task. Being obedient to His calling is worship.

So, take on the task of your assigned row. With God as your supply and your strength your field will be tended and 

your harvest will be great.

Soli Deo Gloria

PAM