Thursday, January 2, 2014

HEAVEN

Several years ago I was teaching my middle school general music class. Once a semester I would assign students the responsibility of coming up with something to perform for one another. This is a day that most of the students enjoy and I like to call it "talent day". Someone always surprises me on talent day. A student who has never indicated to me that they can dance might perform a wonderful ballet for the class, or a student might whip out a violin and play the heck out of a Texas fiddle tune. Someone who never let on to me, might be an excellent singer, a comic, a yo yo-ing genius or a soccer ball dribbler extraordinaire. And then there is always the class clown who is just double jointed and can contort like no other! I always enjoy talent day and my students do too.

This one particular talent day I was in for a unique surprise and an unexpected life lesson from one of my special needs students. Brittney wanted to perform that day. She was confined to a wheel chair with very little arm and hand mobility and no leg mobility and she had a very limited vocabulary. She did have beautiful shining eyes and a smile that seemed to never leave her face. She had chosen to sing for us. Now I must report that my public school music class and choir students are the most polite people when it comes to these special needs kids. They encourage them, help them and cheer them on to success. In my 13 years of public school teaching this has happened in every class without exception. I knew that this sweet girl, Brittney, would not be able to articulate the words of whatever song she had chosen, but that the students would smile and cheer her on. It would be a fun experience for her. Little did I know it would be a lesson for me and everyone in the room.

Brittney handed me her burned cd and I put it into the cd player. Together, she and I moved her wheel chair in front of the microphone at the center of the room. I went over and adjusted it. I knew she really couldn't sing the words, but I wanted her to feel like she was singing with a microphone just like the other singers who had gone before her. I went over to the cd player and clicked play.

The song began and I thought to myself, "oh, I know this song...we have sung it in church many times". So, Brittney started to kind of mumble along. As the song progressed the smile on her face got bigger and bigger and she mumbled just a little louder as the chorus started to play. The words were...

"Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all
I can only imagine

I can only imagine
When that day comes
And I find myself
Standing in the Son

I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever
Forever worship You
I can only imagine"

As we watched that smiling, wheel chair bound young girl singing, "will I dance?" "to my knees will I fall?", "will I stand in your presence?" there was not one child who did not understand the profundity of that moment. There was not a dry eye in the room.

As the song came to a close I had to collect myself. I think I understood, if only slightly, a little bit of what Brittney was saying to all of us. She was telling us of her hopes and dreams to dance and to stand and to sing and to drop to her knees. She was also communicating to us that she was confident this was going to happen one day. She was confident that in heaven she would be whole.

Now, I am not a theologian. I don't claim to understand the mysteries of life. Why was Brittney born to be a loving, smiling child confined to a wheel chair and in constant dependence to those around her? I have no idea. I cannot begin to understand that. I just have this child like faith that I cling to and it carries me through the good and the bad of my life. I am a Christian.

I have friends who don't believe in God at all. They are nice, intelligent people. Faith seems strange, maybe even stupid to them. I think it might be because someone who said they were Christian hurt them or didn't live up to their expectations of what a Christian should be. I certainly understand that! Maybe they look at folks like Brittney and wonder, "if God is a loving God how could He possibly allow an innocent child to have such dreadful limitations?" We've all wondered such things. I respect my friends who have chosen to believe God can't exist, but in my heart I know they are wrong.

Brittney strengthened my faith in God and in Heaven that day. You see, I don't believe she was put on this earth to be taught. She was put here to teach. And she taught me a great lesson that day. She taught me to believe in Heaven. All the things that are wrong with me, the weaknesses and the imperfections will one day be made whole. As I walk through this life I should do so with joyful expectancy like my friend and former student, Brittney.

I don't know where you stand on the subject of God and heaven. I'd like to encourage you to believe with child like faith. It works for me and it really works for Brittney. I'd also like to invite you to read the beautiful poem I've put at the end of today's blog. It was written by Morris West.

Might I encourage you to explore a little child like faith in the new year? My little bit of child like faith tells me that one day Brittney and I will be dancing together in Heaven! Happy New Year!

CLOWNS OF GOD

I know what are you thinking.
You need a sign.
What better one could I give
than to make this little one whole and new?
I could do it; but I will not.
I am the Lord and not a conjurer.
I gave this mite a gift I denied to all of you
ETERNAL INNOCENCE
To you she looks imperfect
but to me she is flawless,
like the bud that dies unopened,
or the fledglings
that fall from the nest to be devoured by ants.
She never offended me,
as all of you have done.
She never perverted the work of My Father hands.
She is necessary to you.
She will evoke the kindness that will prompt you to
gratitude for your own good fortune....more.....
she will remind you every day that I am who I am,
that My ways are not yours,
and the smallest dust mite whirled in darkest
space does not fall out of my hand.
I have chosen you.
you have not chosen me.
this little one is my sign to you.
TREASURE HER.

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